endless list

this is the time of the year for lists; you know, the year’s top 10, bottom 10, whatever. they’re everywhere.

it’s usually tough for me to come up with such a list since what constitute my “top 10” vary depending on my mood and interest of the moment. it’s not unusual for me to have different top tunes, say, before and after lunch.

that’s why as fascinating and revealing an exercise, i never really got the “desert island discs” thing, or a short list of essential music for when stranded on a deserted island. no matter how hard you try, it seems to me, listening to the same shit over and over again is one sure way to hell.

nevertheless, there are tunes that i enjoy more often than others. music, unlike people, never disappoints. if a song i like makes me feel a certain way when i first hear it, when i hear it again, even years later, i would feel pretty much the same way.

i have been an avid mixtape fan/compiler since high school. it's an opportunity for self-expression, and the corresponding listening experience can be an exhilarating mosaic of emotional vignettes, linked not necessarily by style, texture, or tempo, but by my emotional response. for a playlist to have any staying power on my stereo, it must work with my ever changing moods.

i have compiled thousands of mixtapes/playlists with various themes to match my preoccupation of the moment. lately i’ve been listening to some of my older tapes and found two made almost 10 years apart that were both at one time among my favorites. here are the partial playlists (i.e. one side from each tape):

violet blue (1988)

any love – luther vandross
happily ever after – julia fordham
love saw it – karen white
crush – primitives
groove me – guy
nothing can come between us – sade
spy in the house of love – was not was
apron strings – everything but the girl
don’t stop your love – keith sweat
arena – colorbox

an evil day at the beach (1997)

underground sound – adventures in stereo
wrecking ball – emmylou harris
dealer – scott walker
threnody for carlos chavez – lou harrison
el sinsonte – pancho quinto
life him up – the institutional radio choir
let’s go swimming – arthur russell
aqua marine – santana
yo le canto a la montana – el quinto criollo
the look of love – yuka Honda + sean lennon
moon river - audrey hepburn

ok, so my taste back in the ‘80s was more pop-leaning and r&b-driven, with a squirt of velveeta. but there was a respectable stylistic spread represented by teddy reily’s new jack swing and colorbox's eletronic blue-eyed soul, just like the set that spans arthur russell’s chamber dance music and pancho quinto’s boriqua folk 10 years later.

what really sets the selections apart is the overall tone: the 1997 excursion feels darker and more introspective. even the adventures in stereo track, the obvious counterpart to the primitives' power pop from the first reel, feels more shaded, as if ambivalent about its own upbeat stance. i recall reaching for a broader musical experience back in the late ‘90s, reflecting a personal need for change and what i described to a friend then as “a hunger for something beautiful.” as result, my playlists were less about what was happening and more about what i was feeling. even materials that should sound dated, like scott walker’s “dealer” (1983) or arthur russell’s “let’s go swimming” (1986) (with a sick walter gibbons edit), have a sense of immediacy and emotional currency though both were produced before most of the materials on the 1988 tape.

moreover, audrey hepburn's take on "moon river" remains essential listening for me to this day. maybe because henry mancini and johnny mercer wrote it especially to accommodate her limited vocal range, or maybe it was capote's story, hepburn managed to deliver a simple and definitive interpretation that perfectly captured the yearning for something better.

i have about 20 or so playlists at any given time on my itunes these days. some are less than 40 minutes long while others can go on for days. but even the shortest list was compiled and tweaked over days if not weeks, and at times months. as such, they are less affected by whims of the daily grind and speak more directly to a personal perspective on life. like “an evil day at the beach,” their correlation with everyday life would fade with time without diminishing their overall emotional resonance, because ultimately, they are not about what i do but who i am.

Posted by cellpharmer at January 10, 2005 05:17 PM